Baby In The Bathroom

What to do, what to do?

You're at the Ohio State/Michigan game with your baby. He/She has a diaper full of Michigan and there's not a changing table in sight. Do you rest him/her comfortably in a urinal? Hand him/her off to a complete stranger? So many decisions...

Ladies and gentleman! Boys and girls!

I give you...THE BABY KEEPER!!!



The Babykeeper is a patent pending infant carrier style seat, that hangs from the stall wall in most public restrooms, and can also be used in many public fitting rooms.

Almost as cool as the Giordani Bambino Carriage. For $2200, it's kind of like buying your baby an Airstream!

Updates...

It’s official…36 days and counting! Rachel is doing everything she can to deal with the stretching and straining that comes with the final month of the third trimester. Almost every day I hear, “I can not get any bigger.” Unfortunately, with a month left, we know that this is definitely not the case. For you folks out in California and Arizona that have yet to see the progress, here’s a few pics to show you our new pumpkin.



The Columbus baby shower pictures are also now available at Ofoto. This link should be able to take you straight to the site. Just click HERE.


The mural in the nursery is finally finished. I think I might have bit off a little more than I could chew with this one. It’s a “block-print” style mural depicting an ocean pier at night. I had borrowed an overhead projector from work to help me stencil the painting onto the wall. After about 25% of it was painted, the bulb blew and I had to change it. After the new bulb was in, I couldn’t (for the life of me) get the picture to line up again and had to freehand the rest of it. Not fun. All in all it took about 7 coats of paint and touch-ups to get the desired effect.



Please ignore the burro piñata in the crib. Now, all we have left is to get a couple of plants, some curtains, and the camcorder and we should be good to go.

We’re also super excited for the Thomas family to make their voyage out Ohio. Rachel’s mom and sister should be here on November 10th, with her brother and dad arriving soon after on the 16th. I hope baby will hold out until then. I still believe we’re going to have a Halloween baby, just because of all the recent movement. A couple of days ago Rachel had her belly exposed and I could actually see the judo chops from all the way across the house. The baby dojo is out of control. He/She has got to be a black belt by now. The Thomas family trip will also be interesting for another reason…it’s going to be OSU/Michigan week. We were scared that they wouldn’t be able to get a hotel room, but it looks like things are going to work out. 100,000+ at the stadium, with another million tailgaters outside, will definitely be a site to see. You can’t really prepare for Michigan week when you’ve never seen it before. My buddy Jared is also trying to acquire tickets for the game, but last time I checked they were going for $2000+ on Ebay. Insanity!

Speaking of which, I’m not sure how many people know the story or not, but this is a good one. After the wedding in Mexico, Jared (my best man) informed us that we needed to give him a nephew, but we had to wait until Thanksgiving. He would be in town in November and it would be perfect timing. Well, after trying for 5 months, it looks everything was panned out just right. Not only can he predict stock prices to a tee, but he can also plan humans! So the Sweitzer’s will be in from Phoenix right around the delivery, as well. Visitors from all over, family, friends and a new baby. What more could we ask for?

And last but not least, congratulations to Chris and Deena on their new daughter. Some of you might remember Chris as a groomsman in Mexico, and Deena as the Universal Life Church-ordained minister of the ceremony. Her name is Lauren Olivia, weighing in at 8 lbs. 3 oz, and 20 inches in length, with 20 hours of labor! What a beautiful baby. We couldn’t be happier for them. Now, on to getting them a playmate…

In the yeeeeaaar twoooooo-thooooousand....

The information age is here and now.

If you want to know why I'm worried about raising a technologically savvy child, click here.

And the worst part is, not only did their son buy it, but he bought the Barbie version.

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Side Note: I promise to have the Columbus baby shower pictures up soon. With no internet at the house, blogging isn't as easy as it used to be. Sorry :(

The mosquito that buzzes loudest...

I was hoping to cool down before posting this, but oh well...

It's official: Rachel and I have met the most annoying couple in the world! Where to begin...

We started our birthing classes last week (including, but not limited to: "Baby In My Body - 101," "Bottle or Breast 203," "Advanced Lamaze - 302," and "Remedial Oh-My-God-8-Centimeters-is-How-Freaking dilated - 401"). Our instructor is nutty (cooking lady Rachel Ray nutty), but a very kind and helpful woman. She's also a registered DULA and a three-time mom, so she understands the need for couples to learn, but at the same time allow them to experience the birthing process on their own. It seems like she'll cover all our bases and I can honestly say that it feels like we've made a lot of progress in our preparedness. We've asked some really good questions and covered a lot of ground. We feel like we're in really good hands.

Now, onto the annoying couple....Ziad and Colleen

I know that hemorrhoids can be common during pregnancy, but I had no idea that they came in human form (coincidental, considering Ziad's name means "growth" in Arabic). They are our newest classmates, and the itch on our birthing mat.

You see, it all began when Z&C arrived to class about 45 minutes late. They didn't give a reason, but I'm assuming it's because the rehab clinic next door was running late on methadone prescriptions.*

*Although that assumption is mean and based entirely on the couple's appearance, it's probably true.

All of us are nervous, first-timer parents yearning for knowledge, so you have to assume that everyone in the class is out to be the best parent they can be, right? I never expected a bad seed in a group like this. So with the room almost full (and having no idea what we were about to do) we happily scooted over our pillows and mats to give them a seat. While I can say that the first 45 minutes of the class went by great, the last 2 hours and 15 minutes took about 3 months.

Some highlights...

1) The beginning
Upon (late) arrival, they proceed to ask questions that had already been covered. Dani, our instructor, calmly explained that she would catch them up after the break. This lasted 45 seconds until they asked yet another, already covered, question. Wash, rinse, repeat every two minutes.

2) Flashback questioning
This is a sophisticated technique of spacing out during a question. Obviously a little bit burnt out, Colleen would ask a Dani something, get distracted by a sparkly item in the room, and then finish the first question with a completely unrelated question she was thinking about. For example, "So if my water breaks and I'm buying some crystal meth....wow, sparkly....you like to fish?"

1/2 one question + second 1/2 of unrelated question = annoying

3) Chuck You
We were asked to get comfortable, so the couples moved to the floor and supported one another on their pillows and mats. This is the point in the evening when Colleen stuck her Chuck Taylor's (likely, at one point, actually owned by Chuck Taylor, himself) in our face. Apparently, Z&C's "comfortable position" was in our laps. This is also a point in the evening when I thought I saw tract marks on her hip. Rachel quickly reminded me that, what might appear to be track marks, could in fact be the baby trying to claws it's way out of the womb.

4) Meditalking
This was a breaking point for me. Whilst relaxed, quietly enjoying Couples' Meditation, Ziad and Colleen proceeded to discuss anything and everything. Given the fact that it was spoken in grunts and burps, I was not able to translate. However, I did acknowledge (during meditation, mind you) that the new seating arrangement had brought me within striking range of Ziad.

5) Basketbalanceball
After the class we had some more questions for Dani. We decided to stick around and get some one on one, since most of the class had been interrupted. During this time, Z&C decided to walk around the classroom and pick up every balance ball by bouncing it the full length of the room to the closet...what felt like 200 yards. At this point, even Dani directed a kindergarten teacher-like stare at both of them. Z&C all but ignored it, mostly due to ball's large size and bounciess (similar to sparkly distraction seen in Flashback questioning). I inform them the balls are more fun in the street.

These are just a few things that were difficult to deal with in class. Now let me be the first to admit that I know that a birthing class is no place for anger. You're with the love of your life, exploring unchartered territory, learning how to welcome a new soul into the world, yet there it was...Anger. This is how I know that Ziad and Colleen are the worst people in the world. Anyone that can ruin a birthing class? C'mon.

After class was finally over (thank you), Rachel and I prayed the rest of the night (less a half hour for the Simpson's). We asked God to spare our lives next class, because it's obvious that there's going to be a fight to the death. Ziad and Colleen will be fine, no worries there, but heaven help the couple that has two seats open next to them, 'cause when that methadone clinic lets out next Sunday....

Nothing New, but New Nonetheless

Rolling, tumbling, spinning and swirling…Legs and limbs are EVERYWHERE! Baby is officially in baby form. When feeling Rachel’s tummy, you can now get all the kicking and punching action you want. It’s not just a bump anymore, but a hand-like/foot-like/head-like object, distinguishable on the surface. It’s amazing to actually feel the body parts. You can press lightly on one area and feel another area shift over. Not much to report right now. Still expanding and growing (both of us…I’m 13 months to Rachel’s almost 7). Clothes no longer fit like they used to and Rachel’s still getting used to her “mom jeans.” Sorry love, found the clip and I had to :).

Shopping is a whole new experience, though. We now know the wonders of the “Maternity” 300% mark up. If an item has that simple word on it, you’re automatically allowed to triple the price. It is a close relative to the “Baby” mark up, and a distant cousin of the “Wedding” multiplier. For example: We went to the outlet malls on Sunday. We were looking for furniture and wanted to do a little shopping around. I saw a sock store and expounded that I needed some short sport socks (exciting, I know). Bought a 4 pack for $6 dollars, only to find a 3 pack (baby-sized) at the Osh-Kosh store for $22 dollars. According to the calculations, 3 socks x 1/10th the fabric = we’re learning how to knit. We’re finding solutions for a lot of things. Did you know an adult diaper can hold 6 times the volume of a newborn diaper? By using Depends instead of Huggies, we’ll save $3000 per year! Not to mention, we’ll only need to change the baby once or twice a week! Why nobody has tried this before, I’ll never know.

So anyway, we should have a better update by Monday, the 28th. The next doctor’s appointment is on Friday and I’ll get to hear the heartbeat for the first time! We’ll try and get another hang loose hand sign from him/her.

And speaking of him/her…we just saw Ricardo, Theresa and their new boy Raymond on Sunday. With two children, Theresa says that there is a LOT of truth in the Chinese birthing calendar. Every friend (but one) that has referenced the calendar has guessed right as to whether or not they were having a boy or a girl. I’m happy to report that Rachel just ran our numbers and as of right now, it says we’re having a boy. As much as I’d like to say I don’t believe the Chinese calendar, one thing's for certain; their cookies don’t lie! This is from when we were trying to get pregnant:

Only one regret...

While I understand this has nothing to do with baby T, I just can't help it. I'm amazed, awestruck, astounded by this.

Read on....

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I am saddened today. I now realize there was one thing I didn't do while we were in California.

Behold!!!!

The 100 Patty IN & OUT burger!




Click here to see the making, eating, and destruction of this beast.

Stats
Total cost: $97.00
Total calories (extrapolating from info provided here): 19490 calories
Total eaters 8 (2 girls and one guy who already ate dinner and only ate 6 patties)
Most patties eaten by one person : about 20 per person
Time to finish : less then 2 hours

Steven...we now have a new goal for the next trip. I wonder why nobody touched the fries?

BABY UPDATE:

Food Size - Baby is about the size of a 6 patty dbl dbl.
News - Now entering the third trimester. Rachel just had a doctor's appointment on Wednesday and everything is looking good (8/3). Movement is spread out through the day, but still concentrated from 9:00pm to 11:00pm.
Music - A new nature/meditation disk from Tarjay.

California Baby Shower

What a wonderful week! We had such a great time in California. Rachel's mother worked like mad getting everything together. There was duck painting, bead stringing, guac making, pick-ups, drop-offs, and so much more. With so much to do, she pulled it off swimmingly!


You can look at all the pictures by clicking here. You might have to sign up (for free) from the site. I'm not sure how it works anymore. It's been a while since we uploaded pictures.

And don't purchase pictures from the site, either. If you would like a copy of the picture disc, I'd be more than happy to email you a copy. Just drop me a line at either jamesthornburg@yahoo.com.

UPromise

Some of you have inquired about the Upromise link on the right. I'll try to explain it the best that I can.

Upromise is a free website that adds savings from credit cards and grocery cards into a 529 college savings account. All you do is register your cards on the Upromise website and a portion of your purchase are automatically added to your account. More is added if you buy items with the Upromise logo.

Same goes for online purchases if you shop directly through the UPromise website to the link you're using. If you're going to shop at a site, simply go to the Upromise site first and see if it is affiliate. If so, click on their link and you'll be redirected to the site you want to shop at. Usually about 3% to 7% of your purchase is donated.

If you haven't set one up for your child (or future child), it's easy and free. I'd highly recommend it. You're already spending money on the stuff, why not get something back?

California Dreaming

T-Minus one day and counting...


Just 24 hours from now we'll be Westward bound, taking baby on his/her first vacation. Granted, amniotic fluid looks pretty much the same wherever you are, but hey...it took me till my teens to fly for the first time. I'm excited for the little guy.

It's time to see Momma and Poppa Thomas in California. They haven't seen Rachel's belly yet, so we're super excited. She's growing so quickly and looking as beautiful as ever.

Note: Artist rendering of Rachel's new belly. James as Model.

With moving less than a month away, this vacation couldn't come at a better time. Although we can't wait to get into our new Clintonville digs, we really need to pre-unwind before the packing. Work has been hectic, lives scatterbrained....Beach-time is just what the doctor ordered.

Rachel, the prepared person she is, has already made a checklist. Not for packing or luggage, but places she needs to eat at when we get out there (it's hard to have a food craving when it's on the other side of the country). I think it goes something like this:

1. Wahoo's Fish Tacos

2. In & Out Burger

3. Jack in the Box

4. TK Burger

As for me, I could live at Wahoo's or In & Out, but Jack in the Box scares the &*%# out of me because of E-Coli scares in Ohio (got most of the Midwest J&B's shut down in the 80's). Fortunately, they've never had those problems out west. And TK Burger is all but a blur in the memory of my last visit to Cali. We had a few drinks before eating there. Might have to skip the cocktails this time!

We haven't eaten in a week in order to prepare for the gorging to come (just joking, moms. Leafy greens, fruits, protein and veggies every day).

In other news, Rachel's Jeep is offically sold. Many tears have been shed over our loss. Rachel asks that in lieu of flowers you please make a donation to the "Green Jeep Memorial Fund." Joking, of course.

She was sad to see it go, but it's in good hands now. Cindy's son is taking it to college, where I'm sure it will be turned off and tucked in by 9:00 pm every night. It's just never easy to send your firstborn off to college. They grow up so fast.

Have no fear. It's not time for the momwagon yet! There's been a ruling by the High Court of Racheltown that soccer mom vehicles are illegal!!!

Official Ruling: Under no circumstances shall the Thornburg Family, namely Rachel and James [parents] plus kin, ever utilize seats that stow and/or go. As a result any and all vans, minivans, and station wagons are off limits. This ruling is also limited to any vehicles, regardless of size, manufactured by the following companies: Suzuki, Daewoo, or Suburu.

There are always exceptions, of course....

Like this. Or maybe this. Or what about this special Railroad Model.? And last but not least, my personal favorite.

BABY UPDATE:

Food Size - Baby is about the size of a large mango, small canteloupe.

News - Baby is also a black belt in Judo and Tae Kwon Do. Practice is daily from 9:00 to 11:00 pm. Baby specializes in kicks and punches to the midsection. Kicks and punches increase if baby likes music Mom is playing for him/her. Movement is beginning to be visible on the outside of Mom's tummy.

Music - Miles Davis (Some Kind of Blue), Thicker Than Water Soundtrack (Thanks Steven and Ashley), Jack Johnson (Some Live Songs), Ravi Shankar (Mantram Chant of India), The Beatles (Mix), Sigur Ros (Saeglpur), and a Sounds of Nature disc.